I currently own both a '97 850R and an '88 Alfa Romeo Spider Veloce. These are completely different cars and I am having trouble understanding your wanting to compare them. A much more apt comparison would be between an Alfa 164 or Milano and the 850. But here goes anyway.
Appearance - Spider is the handsdown winner with its classic pininfarina body. It turns heads everytime I take it out. I have never even heard a comment about my R.
Performance - The Spider is a seat of the pants driver's car. It is like driving a go kart. The engine revs beautifully and the 5 speed manual is a blast to shift. The R is a very fast sedan but is much more isolated from the road. No where near as fun to drive on a twisty road but much better in rush hour traffic.
Utility - I can just fit my golf clubs in the spider trunk. If I want to take my wife with me we can squeeze her set behind the seats. With the R I can take a whole foursome to the course with their clubs.
Operating expense - I have around 60k miles on both. Not counting oil changes I have spent about $400 for service on the Alfa and around $1000 for the Volvo with a $300 timimg belt coming due soon. I also just found out that my whole A/C system is shot in the Volvo and it will cost about $2k to fix. I haven't even tried to use the A/C in my Spider in the last four years. Basically the Alfa is a lot lower tech than the Volvo and when it does break is cheaper to repair but is still a very well designed car. Just read any book on the history of motor racing and you will get an idea of Alfa Romeo's engineering capabilities.
Depreciation expense - the 850s have not held their valuations very well. My four year old is now worth less than half of what I paid for it. Every mile I drive it drops the value another 15 cents. The Spider has also reached the 50% valuation mark after 13 years. Now it is holding pretty flat. Valuation is not so much based on mileage as condition. Older Spiders from the late sixties and early seventies are actually appreciating.
Safety - No Airbags probably a plus, no ABS probably a minus depending on the driver, Crush zones - the Alfa is a pretty sturdy car and I have heard of side impacts at 30 mph that don't damage the interior door panels - I am sure the Volvo is better but I bet it isn't that much better.
Conclusion - So why do I own both? The Spider is my fun car and the Volvo is my everyday car. If I lived in Hawaii I would probably just drive the Alfa but here in Illinois it is just not practical.
Drew
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