Hello My name is Jones. I adore my volvos, and I have a very interesting story to share with you guys. It happened back in 1998, and I can now share it with people, unlike before.

As soon as I got my Volvo 240 GL in 1986 I knew it was special. I just drove it and drove it; the vibrations from the 3.2 Petrol were amazing. I just loved driving it, me and my Volvo went everywhere, on little day trips all over the place, it was great and I enjoyed it immensely. I mean it just progressed and progressed until one day I slipped my penis into the cigarette lighter socket and that wonderful 12-volt buzz made me cum instantly, sending shivers up my spine and through my penis, I was left with an empty feeling of gratification.
After that wonderful day I was just in love with my 240, I drove it more and more, and frequently shagged the socket. I shagged this constantly at least 3 times a week until 1992. I soon moved on to having intercourse under the handbrake, and in the slots in Volvo headrests. Getting more and more inclined to fuck more parts of my car; I even had sex with the air vents, and even in between the window and door. My sperm looked soooo great running down the glass; I just loved my Volvo so much. I moved round the car and even fucked the exhaust, this was so amazing, it just put so many tickly feelings down my massive hard penis, it just got harder and harder, and sent shivers down my spine, and all through my body, it was so great i had to scream with pleasure, so hard it was so amazing, I soon ejaculated into the exhaust and started the engine and watched my spunk boil on the pipe.
I happily had sex with my Volvo exhaust till 1994, I soon moved onto having sex with the bonnet latch then moved on to having sex with the cylinders, and finally the carburettor, OH MY GOD, the carb was soooo good, I remember it was a sunny day in July 1994 and I was feeling rather horny, so I got hard by licking my Volvos bonnet, then rapidly shagged the carb, that was so incredible, I felt the sperm rushing from my testicles immediately, it sent shivers through every part of my body, and just made my dick so wet, I fucked it harder and harder and harder, and got tickles all through me, and when I eventually orgasmed it was soo good I fainted, fell backwards and hit my head on a nearby Honda lawnmower. I was out for about 5 hours; I then woke, cleaned up the skin of dried sperm and then went out for a drive. I happily shagged my Volvo until 1998
[I then tried the fuse box and that was just as good as the carb. I shagged the fuse box daily and obviously cleaned up, for 3 years… but then the most terrible thing happened. On one sunny April morning in 2001 disaster struck, I had just shagged my fuse box, and I finished and I had a phone call from a friend! he was in trouble and lived 150 miles away, in my haste I forgot to wipe up! I jumped into my baby and shot away. I was driving at 110mph down the motorway, my Volvos top speed, and smoke started billowing into the cabin and out do the engine, I didn’t know what to do! The dashboard and plastic controls started melting! I then saw orange light, and the Volvo started making choking sounds! There was no where to pull over, I had to drive another 10 miles before I could pull over. As soon as I stopped I heard a loud bang and flames poured out of the a/c vents and into the car. I leaped out and foolishly opened the bonnet. Flames exploded out from under, and severely burned my facial hair, removing my eyebrows and fringe.
I watched as flames poured into the car, I ran to the passengers side, fought through the flames to get the fire extinguisher from the glove box, but in my speed knocked over a bottle of white spirit I had for removing stains, and it engulfed me and the glove box, I stopped dropped and rolled, and by the time I had finished, the whole car was a ball of fire, and eventually the fuel tank exploded, sending shrapnel everywhere, I cried and cried tears of woe as my baby burned away, the fire brigade were soon on the scene, but it was too late, my car was dead, dead as a dodo, 1986-2001. I lost many possessions, and I have a tombstone for her in the local graveyard, she will never be the same, and till this day I will mourn her, I have obviously Moved on and I make love to all 14 of my Volvos, but more regularly my 1974 140. Thanks guys for reading I hope you appreciate how much I loved her