Okay...thank you to absolutely everybody who helped me in my quest to repair or destroy this car. Couple of things going on...

Pored over schematics until I couldn't see anymore, only saw one thing in the ignition system schematic that could absorb and distribute any surge or resistance large enough to kill a power stage, further if it was what I call a hard short, it would pop a fuse, so it has to be cummulative, on both sides of the coil, something receiving signal and sending signal...the ignition computer. Only these hardly ever go bad, unless, drum roll please, they get "spiked", which is why we unhook the battery any time we mess with one. So searching along this page of wiring heiroglyphics, and assuming the surges are smaller and cummulative as well, we find ourselves at the main ground to the block, which looks fine, is secured well, but...hmmm...is bent at an interesting angle...and upon doing surgery we find Piece Of Shit wiring that is almost entirely broken in the casing where it is bent. There are also some discolorations on the ignition computer circuit board, so...one cable, one computer, and one coil (and just how many other parts?!?!) later...I can close the book on my tortureous ordeal. I SO HATE THIS CAR! YOU HAVE NO IDEA!