Okay, so my dad got a 960 and we basically don't know what we're doing...

What we have is a 960 with a brand new head, very likely correct timing, and absolutely no start.

Problems:
-Makes a glugging noise when cranking(don't know what this means).
-Can't tell if it sparks but it doesn't smell like it.
-Makes fuel pressure, but no idea if it makes enough or sends injector signals.
-Cranks slow, but I don't know if that's a 960 thing or a broken 960 thing.
-Tach used to jump all over the place but has ceased doing anything anymore.
-Makes a bit of a squeaking noise when cranking(again, no idea what this means).
-Does not even seem to fire any cylinders at all and some times but very rarely backfires.

What we really really need:
-Some ideas of what electrical signals to test with the volt meter.
-VERY VERY SPECIFIC descriptions of the ground wire locations, as we probably bought it from a very incompetent mechanic (they seem to be out to kill me).
-Ground wire locations that are not just wiring diagrams (since those CAN'T show the physical location of the wire).
-Anything else you deem helpful.

Sorry if this seems cut and dry, but this car has been sitting for an annoying long amount of time.