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I usually put the jack stands under the reinforced bars designed for that purpose. There are four of these, along the edge of the body, two in front and two in back. The fronts are just behind the front wheels. Rears are just in front of the rear wheels. The one exception is when doing anything that will require bleeding the brake system. In that case, put the rear jackstands under the rear axle.

In terms of jacking points, I usually jack the front up under the engine subframe and then fit both jackstands. In the rear, I usually jack each side of the rear axle, fit a stand, and then do the other side.

If this method is actually doing some kind of damage to the car, I'd like to hear what others do. FWIW, in a different car I have, it says the rear jacking point is the rear dif. I've seen heated discussions on this forum about jacking Volvos on the rear dif and damage it might do.